54 days later.....

I wrote this as a reflection on the last day of a 54-day novena.

On the 20^th of April I began a 54-day rosary novena. I made the intention my vocation.

Before two years ago, I had never given much thought to my vocation. I had always assumed that I’d get married and have children. To be honest, I didn’t really have an understanding of what a vocation was. As I sought to grow in my faith, I began frequenting the blogs of young catholic women, all of whom had at some point, written about discerning their vocation. As a single young catholic woman, I thought, “why not discern?” so I periodically would do a novena to a certain saint, asking them to lead me on the right path. Now, I’m not saying those novenas didn’t mean anything (shout out to St. Therese of Lisieux, St. Anne, St. Raphael and Mary) but I was never really committed to the discernment process. I expected a particular response and at the end of each novena, I convinced myself that the answer I had wanted all along was the one I was getting. So I left my weak attempts to discern alone.

This year, things changed. Inspired by a friend who was in the process of discerning her vocation, I embarked on a 54-day rosary novena, a journey that has truly changed me. In the past 54 days Mary has taught me to love Jesus fiercely. Jesus has shown me in so many ways that He loves me, adores me and cherishes me deeply. I have found incredible fulfilment in Him and the love He has for me. I thought that through this novena I would know whether or not I was called to marriage or to religious life. Instead, I’ve learnt something so much more important. I’ve learnt that first and foremost God calls me to love and that is an incredible gift. That is where I need to begin and where my focus needs to lie. In time my vocation will be revealed to me. For now, I need to use where I am in my life to love and serve His bride, the Church.

That excites me. God has a vocation for me. In time He will reveal it to me. Perhaps He’ll do it all at one time, or slowly over time. The gift of this novena was not my vocation wrapped up in a bow, but the grace of being open to God’s will in my life. The gift of being able to say “Let it be done unto me according to Thy will”. 54 days later..... I have learnt to love.

I pray that you may be open to whatever plan God has for your life knowing that above all, He calls us to love.

God bless xx